Making Sibling Rivalry Work For You

Potty Training Angelo has been quite difficult (as I have noted in the past). Misty and I realized a few weeks ago that we needed to rethink our methods of enticing Angelo to the toilet. Taking away things in the past resulted in a standoffish child that was no more ready to use the toilet than our cat. Our tactics have evolved to deal with this omnipresent threat to our collective sanity and the landfills.

We realized that the carrot and stick approach we were offering to change his behavior didn't really speak to Angelo. Yes he enjoyed treats when we gave them to him, but they were very much out of sight out of mind later in the day. We would all forget about them. Then we got the idea that we would promise him a trip to Chuck E Cheese if he would go in the potty for a solid week. I think a week is a difficult concept of time for a child who is not yet three years old. Nonetheless we tried it and it worked for a while, but eventually failed just like the rest of our best-laid plans.

Then a couple of days ago Mommy had a brilliant idea. It was so brilliant that I let out a fiendish snicker after I heard it. Here goes: Mommy parades Angelo around Check E Cheese and shows him everything he will get to do when goes potty all the time. She even goes to the token machine and buys enough tokens to play Skee-Ball until your arm falls off. Then she brings the him home and begins to dole out the tokens (1 for #1, 2 for #2) to which Angelo replied that he would go #3...I think that means both at the same time, but I'm not 100% sure. We also noted that if he went in his diaper we would take the same number of tokens away.

Sure enough this kid is clipping right along collecting tokens until all of a sudden his potty training zealousness wanes. He begins soiling his diapers again so we begin to subtract tokens. His mountain of coins began to dwindle until he was down to one. This see-saw battle had to end.

Enter sibling rivalry. Yesterday we officially announced that every time Angelo went in his diaper that he would not be giving the token back to us, but instead he would be giving them to his older brother.

Talk about a child who is now on fire for going potty in the toilet! My only worry was that Antonio would try to prevent him from going in the toilet, but he is simply not that kind of brother. Angelo hasn't missed a beat since our fiat yesterday. Angelo was even dry when he woke up this morning! He is all about strutting into Chuck E Cheese chest out, chin up, dragging a bag o' coins behind him and ready to claim his spider ring minions. This kid has the potential to buy his own CEC franchise with all the tickets he is going to win.

Now I'm not saying that he is fully potty trained, but he is well on his way. I think a little sibling rivalry can be a good thing every now and then, especially when it is applied to a constructive end.

What's The Deal With Dinner?

I can't understand why my children have such a problem eating dinner as a family at the table. We really don't have problems for breakfast or lunch, but for some reason dinner time is when the wheels on the bus completely fall off. It is so difficult to get them to even eat half of what's on their plates before the antics start. My children think that dinner time is basically their own personal times to be as disobedient as possible. I personally think that they save it up all day only to release it at the dinner table. Everything from crawling under the table, to throwing food, to "he's putting his foot in my face" (don't laugh this happened tonight). I'm really getting sick of this because after a long day the last thing I want to do is play part WWF Referee and part wet nurse.

We have tried so many different ways to get them to eat. We've tried earlier dinners, later dinners, smaller dinners, and feeding them something totally different for dinner all to no avail. We have even tried some carrot and stick approaches. My top 5 are below:

• Promises of Dessert - I personally think that Mommy blew this one for us. She caved in regularly in the past so now the kids are reluctant to believe her when she tells them that there will be no dessert unless they eat dinner. Advantage Kids.
• Promises to Stay Up Later- Right. Totally not a currency they truly grasp at this point in time. Not to mention that Antonio has his own concept of bedtime (more like T + 2 hours if we are lucky).
• Spankings - Oh yes, that's right spankings. Call it an adult temper tantrum, but there is nothing like the crack of a wooden spoon on an obstinate child's hiney. Sweet music!
• We'll Watch Your Favorite Movie After Dinner - Yeah...like they care! This only works if their favorite movie is "Guess What I Hid Under the Table!"
• I'll Give You $1 Million If You Will Be Quiet and Eat Your Dinner - Since they have no concept of money I thought it would be worth a try. Rejected.

Nothing seems to work. I can't get the kids to eat anything we cook no matter how appetizing, but when we go to Costco the kids will eat everything in sight so long as it is served on a toothpick or in a dixie cup. Actually I might be on to something here. From now on we will be serving chicken nuggets, cocktail weenies, and taquitos on toothpicks for dinner. Anything less solid like pasta or vegetables will now be served in dixie cups. Who cares if their dinner plates look like party service trays? As far as I'm concerned problem solved!